Every morning for many years, I’d have the strongest coffee drink known to man…a large coffee from Peet’s with 2 shots of espresso. Often, the barista would say, “Y’know cocaine isn’t that much different.”

But over the past few weeks, I’ve been able to wean myself from coffee thanks to one single and powerful quote I discovered in the sweetest book I’ve read in years: Saltwater Buddha. The quote from the Tao Te Ching: “Nothing in the earth is more flexible and yielding than water. Yet when it attacks the firm and the strong, none can withstand it. They have no way to change it.”

In the ancient Eastern cultures, water is often equated with emotion and upon reading the quote, I realized emotion properly harnessed is supremely powerful, like a giant wave. But fail to harness your emotions and they begin to froth in your core, like a dangerous and violent sea. I imagine some of you can relate to those days when you feel like you’re bobbing, gasping, hoping to be rescued from chronic anxiety, worry, and fear?

Over the past few weeks, I’d come to realize that my emotions had turned stormy, my attention span weathered, my joy fragmented. Why? My mind was over-stimulated. Along with the agitating effects of caffeine come the constant stimuli of our computers, cell phones and other gadgets. I once read that all of our technology is an extension of the mind. There’s no such thing as a machine that is an extension of our emotions. So our minds are becoming like kids without parents, unchecked in an over-caffeinated world.

In the process, a demanding mind causes so many of us to lose touch with our emotions. According to the yogis, lose touch with your emotions and you cut your power in two.  Following are three scientifically proven ways that being in touch with your emotions can enhance your life:

1. People in touch with their emotions are more influential

In the book The Political Brain, the author shares science showing that people are much more likely to act upon their emotions than they are to act upon their thoughts. Think about it. Even if you didn’t vote for him, President Obama has a rare skill to deliver a speech and trigger emotions in those watching. His power of oration played a huge role in his being elected President. When you are able to quiet the mind, you not only sense your own emotional state but also what other people are “feeling.” In this ever-so shallow world where we forsake conversation with the person in front of us in line in order to call a person in some other time zone, wouldn’t it be unique to tap someone on the shoulder and ask, “How are you feeling today?”

2. People in touch with their emotions advance farther in their careers

In the book The Likeability Factor, the author shares research showing that one’s “likeability” plays a huge role in their ability to improve their career standing. When you are mentally agitated and consumed by technology, you become less likeable. Even if you are productive, nobody will want to be around you if you cut off a conversation over lunch in order to answer your phone. Should you dare to take time to put away the gadgets and relate on a more emotional level to co-workers and clients, you will experience deeper, richer relationships in the long term.

3. People in touch with their emotions fare better in the game of love

In my book, Yeah Dave’s Guide to Livin’ the Moment, I share how one who can feel sadness, pain, and discomfort with grace and courage, is more likely to foster a deeper, more loving relationship with a spouse or significant other. So often, we avoid or resist things that don’t make us feel good. A huge part of love is pain. Kahlil Gibran said, “For as love shall crown you, shall he crucify you.” In my book, I share techniques and thoughts on how a little pain and sadness never hurt anyone and actually can make love that much sweeter.

In conclusion, I’m not suggesting you have to quit coffee to quiet the mind. God knows I miss the smell, the taste, the trip down the road to Peet’s. But the little jolt from a morning shot of espresso is a tiny ripple in a powerful sea of emotion.

Cryin’ Eric Clapton
Oxford Town Bob Dylan
Rockin’ That Thang The-Dream
Cocody Rock Alpha Blondy
Lonesome Road Madeleine Peyroux
Golden My Morning Jacket
Galileo Indigo Girls
All I’m Thinkin’ About Bruce Springsteen
Shangri-La M. Ward
Not Fade Away / Goin’ Down the Road Feeling Bad Grateful Dead
More Than Words Extreme
Lonely Girls Lucinda Williams
Your Hand In Mine Explosions In The Sky
Eternal Wave Dan Gibson