Archive for October, 2009

It happens to all of us. You’re walking down a hallway and your shirt gets snagged on a doorknob. You are stopped dead in your tracks but worse, your shirt is torn. You turn around, untangle yourself, and move on, a little more vigilant of protrusions in your path.  Worrying works in much the same way. Things come up in our mind which gets snagged and dragged into a worrisome cyclone of fear and doubt. Worrying takes us away from the moment whether the moment means playing with the kids or being present in a meeting or being attentive to our partner. But worst of all, worrying prevents us from tapping the true power of the mind.  Amazing things happen when we learn to stop worrying. Following are three examples of how life blossoms in a worry-free environment.

1. Belief
Andrew Weil tells a story where he never once found a four-leaf clover. He recalls meeting a woman who could find four-leaf clovers in any clover patch. She would bet people that within a minute, she’d find one. Weil soon realized the key to this woman’s ability to find four-leaf clovers was her belief. When we unsnag the mind from all that holds it back, belief becomes possible and with belief, everything is transformed.  As Joan de Arc said, “to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.”

2. Trust
If you think back on your life, it’s often when we are most relaxed that the most meaningful encounters happen. In my book, I share a story about a particular moment in 1994 when I was perusing the aisles in the university Munch Mart. I asked the woman to my left, “Do you think these ‘microwavable bologna and cheese cracker sandwiches’ are a good call for a snack?”  Little did I know the woman would one day become Bon Appetit magazine’s Food Artisan of the Year. Her response to my inquiry about the ‘microwavable bologna and cheese cracker sandwiches’:  “Disgusting!”   We fast became great friends and partners in business. If that same moment were to happen in 2009 instead of 1994, I’d probably have been looking at emails on my iphone, worrying about something I wasn’t getting done, and I would have missed the encounter with my future best friend. When we live in the moment, we begin to sense there is a flow that delivers to us just what we need, right when we need it.

3. Visual imagery
Another great story from Andrew Weil (obviously I’m a fan) details a kid who would always day-dream in school. The teacher was hesitant to hastle the kid because he could voluntarily increase his body temperature and the teacher would have to send him to the principle’s office who would subsequently send the kid home. Weil discusses how the link between daydreaming and control of body temperature is very interesting. When the part of the brain responsible for processing info from the eyes (visual cortex) can shift its attention from the outside world to the inside world (as occurs during daydreaming), it has increased power to connect mind and will with the controls of the autonomous nervous system.  That means suddenly enhanced abilities to control body temperature but more importantly, according to Dr. Weil, to elicit spontaneous healing. Again it comes down to worrying. When we let go of our worries about the outside world and turn our attention inwardly through yoga or meditation or daydreaming, we gain tremendous power over our health.

So if you, like me, are a worrier, give yourself a chance:

-Trust in the moment to deliver the relationships, opportunities, and encounters that can forever change your life. When the moment is flooded with worry, it’s impossible to notice all the good that is coming right to your doorstep.

-Never doubt the power of belief to forever transform your life. When your shirt is snagged on the door, it’s impossible to “believe” in anything but untangling your shirt.

-Allow time each day to let go of all the things that bind you to the world. Even if you’re really worried, give yourself a chance to close your eyes and imagine yourself healing, triumphing, living your life of dreams.

by David Romanelli (www.yeahdave.com)

For tips on learning how to release fears, worries, and struggles through chocolate, wine, and music, check out my book Yeah Dave’s Guide to Livin’ the Moment: Getting to Ecstasy through Wine, Chocolate, and your Ipod Playlist.

As we head for the home stretch in 2009, I think many would agree on an enduring lesson. Those in authority, whether Wall Street executives, bankers, or trendsetters, need to be challenged.

In his book Outliers, Malcolm Gladwell breaks it down by socioeconomic factors and shares research on how wealthy children feel comfortable challenging teachers in school while less privileged children are more likely to accept what they’re told.  Later in life, this inclination to question authority leads to better negotiating and decision-making skills. Just another reason why the rich get richer.

So if your bank account is feeling the grind in 2009, will you be quiet and reserved as Gladwell suggests? Or will you speak up and challenge the authorities, trendsetters, and pacemakers? As a yogi, I’d like to personally challenge the single most impactful voice in my industry: the Yoga Journal.

Here’s my letter to the editor:

“Having spoken with many yoga teachers of my generation who pack their classes and are committed to spreading the joy of yoga, we’d love the opportunity to share at your Yoga Journal Conferences. Beyond the Shiva Rea’s and Seane Corn’s, there’s a whole new generation of yoga teachers out there. This generation is less interested in physical alignment and more interested in alignment with the challenges of the day; less intent on a diet of seeds and water and more intent on a post-yoga bite of chocolate and sip of wine;  less focused on speaking perfect Sanskrit and more focused on speaking the language used in New York, Santa Monica, Duluth, and Detroit. Someone recently shared an awesome quote that I think applies to your readers: ‘People don’t care how much you know. They wanna know how much you care.’ ”

Namaste,

David Romanelli

The behavior of yoga students is often a reflection on their teacher. For instance, the students of Aaron “the Rabbi” King love a little post-class coffee talk and “kibbutzing” if not a nice touch. The students of anti-gravity yoga teachers Brock and Krista Cahill will bust into a handstand in the middle of nowhere. Thus, the Cahills’ energetically uplifting presence. Power Yoga teacher Vinnie Marino’s students have been known to scream at people, especially those who open the window during class. Thus, Vinnie’s brand of “free love… with a cost.”

Someone once said to me, “Yeah Dave, what kind of behavior do you inspire in your students?” Hmm, I thought. And a few months ago, while hanging out with a bunch of random students who had just taken my class, I observed them closely. One student said, “Hey Dave, check this out,” before showing me a random 1 inch long mustache hair on an otherwise smooth upper lip.  “It’s kinda like a dreadlock but different.”

I answered, “Cool Schmata. And it matches your silver Lululemon spaghetti strapped tank.”

Another student said, “Yo Dave, what would you do if someone showed up to your class with three boobs and the one in the middle was exposed with a tattoo of Sammy Davis Jr singing into the nipple-shaped microphone?”

After thinking for a moment, I replied, “Cool Ronald. Kinda like a scrodum tattoo…but different.”

And another student said, “Dave, thanks to your yoga I can now suck my own…” and just as I was about to cover my eyes, he put his toe in his mouth.

I responded, “Cool Reavis. Are you still taking your Lithium?”

I know what you must be thinking and I agree. How freakin’ cool, fresh, and free-thinking are my students? Who needs to talk about the Bhagavad Gita when instead you could talk titty-tattoos? Why bother with the sutras when you could sit around and show off weird body hairs? Free the mind people! Yoga in a modern light! This is why it continues to astound me that the Yoga Journal won’t invite me to its conferences.

*****

I’ve been reading the book Crow Planet: Essential Wisdom from the Urban Wilderness which focuses largely on the intelligence of crows. Crows have their own games, language, relationships, and loyalties. For instance, the author mentions how crows recognize faces and if you take aggressive action against one crow, you will get dive-bombed and harassed by your neighborhood crows for days to come. As crows live in every habitat, you don’t have to travel to the far reaches of the earth to immerse yourself in the wonders of nature. Just look outside your window.

In much the same way, you don’t have to read an intense spiritual book or take peyote to open your mind.  And that is why I’d like to dedicate this Schtick to the stoners, freaks, and weirdos of the world.  Hail to the Schmata’s, Ronald’s, and Reavis’s in your life. They might not teach you anything; but their strange questions and stony visions can pry open your mind’s most stubborn constructs.  God knows…if you’re not crafty enough to open the dusty old storage shed, you’ll never access the treasures, memories, and insights locked within.

In the matter of 2 hours, I met 2 different people who’d been told  they have 6 months to live. In their presence, I felt all of my worries, issues, and concerns fall by the wayside. These people know the true value of each and every moment.

I was presenting at the National Cervical Cancer/HPV Cancer Coalition conference this past weekend in Chicago. It was totally mind-opening and absolutely life-changing.  I’ve never met a group of people who enjoy life more than the ladies attending this conference. They laughed harder, smiled wider, and lived each moment as if it could be the last.  I chatted it up with one attendee for an hour about sports, sleeping late, and countless other topics. Only later did I discover this lady has stage 4 cervical cancer with a diagnosis of 6 months to live.

Winding down the evening, I spoke with another attendee from my hometown of Santa Monica. We complained about parking tickets and the cost of living in Southern Cal while trumpeting the healing power of our shared passion, yoga. I was again shocked to learn that this lady also has 6 months.

To be in the presence of two human beings filled with so much energy and passion yet told by doctors that their number has been Chosen…  This made me think very very carefully about life. Here I am worrying about my ever-increasing Blue Cross premiums, my chronically clogged bathtub drain, the zit on the tip of nose, and why a client won’t return my calls. Contrasted against the ladies at the conference who squeeze each moment for all its juice, my anxiety was an even darker sludge. As Arthur Somers Roche said, “Anxiety is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind. If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.”

In the Great Recession of 2009, so many of us have been sucked into that channel, feeling as if each day we’re being swept toward some new conflict, illness, or headache. These cancer survivors taught me how to say “To hell with the current!” They taught me how to latch onto the shore and climb on the back of laughter to a lofty perch in some brilliantly tropical corner of the mind.  They taught me that while death will come for each of us, why not let it pluck you from the mountaintop rather than slurp you from the sewer of doubt, fear, and anxiety!

The cackles, hoots, and haws of these joyous cancer survivors served as a reminder of the age-old question facing every human being.  “Is each day a step closer to death? Or does each day fill you with another drop of life?

Following are 3 tips to break free from anxiety’s current and reclaim your passion for life:

1. Honor death, don’t fear it

When we live in fear of death, we give in to the current. I invite you to think a little differently about Halloween 2009.  A few years ago I traveled to Mexico during Halloween season and observed the most intriguing tradition. In Mexico, the people mark November 1 and 2 as a window when they believe its easier for the souls of the departed to visit the living. Rather than Halloween, the natives call it “Dia de los Muertos” (see above photo). The graveyards turn into a scene of raucous celebration. I always thought the graveyard to be such as solemn site but after seeing the festive Oaxacans sing and drink tequila while dancing on their loved one’s final resting place, my perspective on death forever changed. This Halloween, consider taking the festivities a step deeper. Celebrate the lives of those have passed to another world. As the Oaxacans would tell you, on these sacred days, they are closer than you could possibly imagine.

2. Consider the Beautiful, Funny, Delicious mantra

There’s a mantra that I embrace to maintain my passion for life. Each day, check off one funny moment, one delicious moment, and one beautiful moment. While it might seem over-the-top, consider how busy we are and how easy it is be stuck emailing instead of watching the sunset…or sorting thru your thoughts instead of stopping to enjoy the street musician on your way to work.  There’s nothing more healing than a hard laugh or a delicious piece of chocolate to lift your mood and sweeten your day.

3. Open up

If troubles in love and relationships are fueling your “current,” the yogis would tell you the solution is easier than you think. When we are rigid and closed off to life, love has no way of finding us. The yogis believe that simply by opening your heart, love moves through you. Whether by reading a book or taking a yoga class or going to an art museum, open up. Rumi put it perfectly, “Don’t seek for love. Seek to find and remove the barriers you’ve built against love.”

If you feel like the current has already sucked you into the sewer in this long and painful year, why not claw your way out? Live, love, laugh…take in a breath of Fall air, give someone a big ol’ hug, and let loose tonight with a little laughter. As goes the Chinese proverb:  “Enjoy yourself. It’s later than you think.”

For more on the National Cervical Cancer Coalition, check out: http://www.nccc-online.org.