“Nothing is more memorable than a smell. One scent can be unexpected, momentary and fleeting, yet conjure up a childhood summer beside a lake in the mountains; another, a moonlit beach; a third, a family dinner of pot roast and sweet potatoes during a myrtle-mad August in a Midwestern town.” Diane Ackerman

From those Drakkar Noir-inspired teenage nights to the creosote bush after a desert rain., a waft of somethin’ special is a sensory wormhole. Take Patchouli, for instance, It will forever remind me of the pre-show butterflies I sensed while trolling the parking lot at Grateful Dead concerts hoping to find veggie burritos, or best of all, a Miracle ticket. But the single most beautiful scent I’ve ever experienced is a gorgeous, potent handmade lavender oil that I’ve been using in my yoga workshops for the better part of the past decade.

Each year Wisdom of the Earth founder and master medicinal aromatherapist Barry Kapp travels with fellow Medicinal Aromatherapist & Partner. Audre Gutierrez,and life partner Cynthia Olivera to the French Alps. They journey to pick lavender from varying elevations ranging from the rarest growth at1800 meters to the highlands at 1200 meters. They make their own, pure, loving oil whose scent has to be experienced in order to be understood. In every single Savasana of every single Yoga + Chocolate, Yoga + Wine, and Yoga for Foodies event I’ve ever taught, I rub a few drops of this special lavender on the participants. It’s less the comments than the audible sighs and visible expressions of true and total surrender. If such a thing was possible as putting an exotic European vacation, epic Savasana, and soothing head message into a tiny bottle…

To pick up a bottle:

Why are we so embarrassed about our privates? The chimpanzees certainly aren’t. Nor are the whales, monkeys, dolphins, or fishies. But us humans wouldn’t dare walk into a public park naked without being arrested. I don’t get it.

12 years ago I attended a naked hot spring retreat called Esalen. At first, I found it extremely awkward to be naked around strangers and went so far as to cover myself before entering the hot springs. But by the end of the weekend, it actually seemed normal and we even called each other by affectionate nicknames like FurryFrieda, DroopyDon, MohawkMaggie, and FreckleDick (short for Richard).

It wasn’t too long ago that I ran into FurryFrieda in the lobby of the Exhale Center for Sacred Movement yoga studio in Venice. Let’s just say when I screamed “Oh My God FurryFrieda how the hell are ya?! I haven’t seen you in years!” that she was less than thrilled to see me and the 73 people waiting in the lobby for Saul David Raye’s morning yoga class were very, very, very curious.

********

We (or at least “I”) spend so much time and energy covering up our fears, neuroses, issues, and privates that we have little time and energy left over to enjoy life. A 2004 survey by Dove Soap found that only 2% of women consider themselves beautiful.* Can you stand naked in front of the mirror, if not in front of DroopyDon and MohawkMaggie, and love yourself and all your imperfections?

Kahlil Gibran once wrote, “For what is it to die but to stand naked in the wind and to melt into the sun!”  For what is it to, in this very moment, stop what you’re doing, and realize: your life is perfect, you’re right where you’re supposed to be, and even if you have a tiny wanker, the people who really, truly, deeply love you won’t care in the slightest. At least I don’t think they will.

Tell me if you’ve endured the following. You are practicing yoga in a sweaty yoga class, and the teacher says, “Warrior 3.” That smelly man in front of you sticks his foot in the air. You watch drops of sweat leave his ankle hairs and fall down on your mat. Coming out of Warrior 3 to place your hands on the mat for standing splits, you navigate to avoid touching that foreign liquid as ferociously as you’d steer clear of a drunk man in a speedo.

One drop of the wrong person’s sweat on my mat could drive me crazy. But I would gladly let my dog kiss me on the lips even though he licks his dog berries after lunch. Is something wrong here?

*****

In March 2002, eleven people abandoned a 260 foot ship about 800 miles south of Hawaii. They left the captain’s dog, a terrier named Hokget, adrift at sea. People caught wind of this story. Money started pouring into the Hawaiian Humane Society which paid $48,000 to a private company called American Marine to look for the ship. Air, sea, and high-tech surveillance equipment were all pressed into service. No luck. Finally, 6 weeks later, after the Coast Guard agreed to access $250,000 US taxpayer dollars, the dog was found…shaken, scared, but still alive hiding under a pile of tires. (See above picture of Hokget, with sun-burned nose, upon his safe arrival in Honolulu on May 2, 2002) When $300,000 is spent to rescue a dog but nearly 1 in 4 children across America are struggling with hunger, does that seem weird?

There’s one thing that us humans are suckers for. Receiving unconditional love. And humans, barring saints or nuns, don’t love unconditionally. We just don’t. Piss off your husband and he won’t jump in your arms and lick your face. Punish your teenager and chances are slim she’ll cuddle you one second later. Being this is my first dog since early youth, I’m realizing what a gift it is to have a bad day and look to Gibson for a good, slobbering smooch. Everytime we’re kissing I can practically hear him say, “It doesn’t bother me one bit that in most of your Facebook pictures you have a double chin. I just wanna love you and love you and love you some more.”

Is it me or is that worth over $300,000?

When the trunk of the Jurupa Oak is destroyed by burning, new shoots pop up all around it from the roots.  Similarly, pine tree cones will store their seeds for years until the heat of forest fires causes the pines to open up and release the seeds. In other words, the most enduring species in our world, things that live thousands of years, depend on fire to trigger regeneration and rebirth.

In 2009, so many of us experienced a different kind of fire that incinerated our finances if not our emotional well-being.  In the heat of the moment, these fires are brutally painful. But in the years to come, we will perceive the smoldering fires of 2009 as necessary means to a brilliant and beautiful future. Here are 3 reasons why…

1. New Direction

For so many of us, it feels like someone took a blowtorch to our savings and nest egg which are now smoldering remnants of what once was a healthy forest of assets. We can be pissed and bitter for so long but notice how the heat of those emotions, as they effect the pine cone, can also reveal within you new life, new freedom, a new path…so long as you get back on your feet and move the ball forward. S.I. Hayakawa said, “Notice the difference between what happens when a man says to himself, ‘I have failed three times,’ and what happens when he says, ‘I am a failure.’ ”

2. Enriched Life Experience

I couldn’t help but look at the above picture of the 13,000 year old Juropa Oak with reverence. For cryin’ out loud, the thing has been around since the Ice Age. There are a certain group of humans who you might say have a durability comparable to the ancient Juropa Oak. The Abkhasian* people of Central Asia routinely live into their 90’s and 100’s and often report only having been sick once in an entire lifetime. Part of their ability to live happily with great longevity is the fact that in their culture, one’s status increases with age. The elderly are seen as beautiful with silver hair and wrinkles being signs of wisdom and maturity. In the Abkhasian language, there is not a term for “old people.” Rather, they are referred to as “long-living people.” *

Things are much different in America where we tend to totally forget about our elders. Why? Compared to the Abkhasians, we have litte respect for life experience whether in the old, middle aged, or young.  Any hardship you have endured adds to your character, wisdom, and perspective. And anyone who knows their ass from their elbow will, like the Abkhasian, respect one who has been through hell and highwater. Helen Keller said, “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”

3. Stronger Relationships

The Vilcabamban* people of Ecuador’s Andes Mountains are another indigenous culture that is revered for its peoples’ ability to live happy lives deep into old age. One notable quality of the Vilcabambans…they don’t armor themselves against the pain of life and “they have not withdrawn from one another into shells.” They consider struggle to be part of the process. The Vilcabamban live in close-knit families and help one another through tough times. “Their spirits are connected to each other, their smiles all the deeper for all they have known and shared.”  *

Like the Vilcabamban, the 13,000 Juropa Oak is in essence more than one tree, it is a close family of trees having cloned itself many times over. And that family of trees, in spite of residing in over-populated over-polluted Southern California, lives on year after year. That is the most important lesson that we can learn from this ancient tree. To endure life successfully means not that you have avoided the greatest hardships and dodged the hottest fires. Rather, you’ve used those hardships and fires to make you stronger, to reveal new emotions, to deepen your roots, to enhance your relations.

*from HEALTHY AT 100 by John Robbins

Step by step, the fly picked up and cleaned its leg and then picked up and cleaned its other leg and did it again and again until it finally was free. My friend recalled how a creature which epitomizes filth and annoyance actually displayed a certain elegance and beauty in its resolve to survive. Which is just the thing we lost in America during the economic boom of the early 2000’s. We were gluttonous in our consumption, in our over-construction, in our values. There was no sense of beauty in our march toward success, wealth, and pleasure.

And now, so much has disappeared, so many homes, things, relationships. And many of us face the same predicament as the trapped fly. Those who freak out will further their trouble. But those who proceed with grace, dignity, and even elegance will most certainly recover and slowly but surely rediscover their wings.

Herein lies the question. If you’re halfway normal, you’re struggling, grinding, busting your butt to make ends meet. In such a state, who cares about beauty?! And how in the world can you possibly be elegant?!?! Following are 3 tips:

1. Service

“An individual has not started living until he can rise above the narrow confines of his individualistic concerns to the broader concerns of all humanity.” MLK

The same friend who told me the story about the fly told me that whenever he feels out of balance, anxious, and lacking, he plugs into the needs of his community and helps someone out. It’s his way of staying centered and putting everything into perspective.

2. Pride

“The only real elegance is in the mind; if you’ve got that, the rest really comes from it.” Diana Vreeland

One thing I’ve learned from my 91 year old grandma…whenever she leaves her retirement home, whether to go to breakfast or take a ride in the car, she always always always dresses up fancy in her scarves and slacks and coats and purses. This is not a matter of her clothes being expensive or inexpensive. Rather she has great pride in spite of her aging body and fading twilight. And no matter how broke, no matter how old, no matter how exhausted you might be, nobody has the right to your pride. Nobody!

3. Touch

Have you ever taken a yoga class and gotten a nice adjustment by the teacher? Or better yet, have you had a friend give you a little shoulder massage when you were really stressed? There is nothing more elegant, graceful, and wonderful than human touch. Like the most gorgeous dress or the most extravagant coat, a loving touch can take your breath away, cause time to stop, and if not for a moment, allow all worries to subside.

Like the trapped fly, take one graceful, firm, empowered step at a time. It might take months or years to recover. But if nothing else, let your recovery be filled with dignity.  As Gandhi once said, “I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.”

Q: Juanta, you recently called yourself the world’s most eligible bachelor. If I was a woman, why would I want to be with you?

A:  As we say in Argentina, “Yo soy muy grande en todos partes” which in English means “Come live in my heart, it is a mansion of love.”

Q: Juanta, why are you still a bachelor?

A:  I am looking perfect American woman. I still no find.

Q: And what of your personal fortune?

A: I just earned $113 million settlement from royal family when I was run over by Prince’s gay son at trailer park. I don’t know how to spend. I already give $10 million to poor, $5 million to hospital, $3 million to cure cancer,  what else can I do? I need woman to spend my money.

Q:  Juanta, why were you at a trailer park?

A:

Q: Juanta, What kind of woman are you looking for?

A:  Woman who like yoga. Woman who travel and come to my country Argentina. Woman who like wine.  Woman who like cuddle.

Q: And how young or old would your ideal woman be?

A:  I only 24 years old. I think I like older woman. 50 years old? Yes! 40 years old? Yes! 30 years old? Yes!  18-25 years old? Too young!

Q: Juanta…tell me more of what you’re looking for in a woman?

A: Perfect body to me no es real. I like full figured woman. We have expression in Argentina… “Tocar el sol es poner la lengua in la boca de una persona muy borracha!”  which means “I dream of your body night and day, I love you for who you are!”

Being a lover of yoga, Juanta will be joining us on my upcoming Yoga + Wine retreat to Argentina with wine champion and Bliss Flow Yoga founder Angela Gargano.  If you’re ready for a food & wine lover’s adventure of a lifetime, join us this April 15-22 in Argentina.  Visit here for more info.

And take note, Juanta will be with us for the post Argentina journey to Rio de Janeiro April 22-25.

1. Food

Last night my girlfriend and I had a pleasant dinner of ground beef, a salad, and a nice Cabernet.  Oh so delicious. 2 hours later, we sat on the couch dumbfounded, awestruck, my girlfriend reduced to tears. Why? We just watched the movie Food, INC which shares the sheer horror, abuse, and disgust of the food industry. I’m not gonna lie to you. I love a good burger, a steak, rotisserie chicken, you name it. But after Food Inc, I’m confused. Something has to change. Consider the following:

–More than 9 billion chickens and turkeys are slaughtered each year. As the Humane Society Reports, “They’re shackled upside down, paralyzed by electrified water and dragged over mechanical throat-cutting blades … all while conscious. Millions of birds each year miss the blades and drown in tanks of scalding water.”

–Crated calves are tethered by the neck, pigs in severe confinement bite the metal bars of their crates, and hens get trapped and can even be impaled in their cages. These animals can barely move for months on end.

–90% of consumed meat in this country comes from factory farmed raised animals who are pumped full of antibiotics, hormones & corn all of which are unnatural & harmful to the animals.  Chickens have become so genetically modified to have larger breasts because that is what the American consumer wants, that they are unable to stand up for longer than a few seconds and spend the majority of their 40 day life-span sitting in their own feces.  Unless you get your meat, milk, and eggs from an independent family farm, this is the meat you eat. *

2. Health Insurance

It’s not just the food industry that is troublesome. We all know about the health care crisis. Much of it is caused by greed.  Consider this: 47 million Americans were without healthcare insurance in 2008. However, the heads of the major healthcare insurance companies earned as follows:

-CEO of United Health Group:  $124.8 million
-CEO of Aetna:  $57 million
-CEO of Cigna:  $42 million.

While these executives were padding their bottom line, there were 22,000 “excess deaths” last year amongst Americans between the ages of 25-64 because they were denied health insurance.**  The healthcare crisis is clearly at the forefront of everyone’s mind.  While it seems we are moving in the right direction, try telling that to the families of the 22,000 people who perished in 2008.

3. Endangerment of the Present Moment

While more abstract than the food industry or the healthcare crisis, something we’ll begin to hear a lot more about in the 2010’s is the endangerment of the present moment. As Facebook and Twitter take over and as the iPhone and Blackberry become smaller, faster, and cheaper, our free moments will suffer the sad fate of the polar bear or any endangered species. Is it me or is every waking second spent texting, emailing, websurfing, status updating, tweeting, etc.  I emphasize in my book Yeah Dave’s Guide to Livin’ the Moment that if we’re not careful, entire days go by without one single memory.

Think about it. A normal person, take me as an example, wakes up, gets right on the iphone, answers emails, talks on the cell phone on the way to work, does emails all day long at work, talks on the cell phone on the way home, and returns home to surf the web, play on Facebook, talk on the phone, watch TV. There’s less and less time free of techonology. There’s less and less time to daydream, to actually talk to the person in front of you in line at Starbucks, to lie down for a snooze, to savor life. The busier we get, the less memories we have to cherish. Right now, we don’t think twice about it. But in the very near future, I believe there will be a desperation for the present moment, for richer memories, for the very essence of life.

*http://www.humanesociety.org/issues/force_fed_animals/
**http://www.nchc.org/facts/coverage.shtml